Thinking On It

Now that I’m a couple months into my senior year, I’ve been forced to think recently. Actually, I’ve been forced to think a lot recently, and about a lot of different things… like my internship with The V Foundation for Cancer Research and what it means to me. Or my internship with McKinney ad agency and what it means to me. Or my senior year, the classes I’m taking, the clubs I’m leading, the thesis paper I’m writing, and the companies I’m applying to. (Why again did I think it was a good idea to do all of this?)

Safe to say, my brain is everywhere, kind of like the weather at this time of year. My yoga teacher would probably tell me that there’s no coincidence there. I’m thinking about my internships when I’m in class, I’m thinking about class when I’m at my internships. You get the picture.

Something specific has been on my mind since a good friend reached out to me a few days ago with an impressive revelation: he figured out what he believes in. I think this is something most people, if not everyone, struggles with. And here is a 23-year-old who’s apparently figured it out. Why? Because he thought about it.

So he got me thinking about it. What do I believe in? Where does my faith lie?

Well, that’s about as far as I got. I’m still thinking about it. No revelations yet.

However, I did make progress. I’ve never been one to believe in destiny or fate or, along those lines, ‘the One.’ But I did believe in a thought that “all things happen for a reason.” How is this possible? To not believe in fate, but in this other thing that I couldn’t name but sounded a lot like fate.

Today, after thinking on it for a while, I realized that what I believe in is this: there’s no predetermined destiny that each action and event is leading me towards with or without my will. Instead, there are dreams of mine that MY actions turn into reality. These things happen for a reason, yes, and the reason is that I made them happen.

Secondly, when bad things happen, it’s not always because I did poorly or didn’t try hard enough. There is such thing as shit luck or just not being good enough. (That’s okay. Thankfully, there are always other things we can be great at.) Claiming, “it all happens for a reason” when things don’t turn out in your favor is, quite frankly, a little sad. It implies that your life isn’t a result of your actions and your effort, and that it’s out of your hands. If you believe this, why try at anything? Instead, just like how any good thing happens, good will come out of bad when and only when you make it happen. There’s no inevitability in lack of effort. You have to find the silver lining among the bad, grab onto it and pull it towards you until the only thing you can see surrounding you is that silver lining and all the goodness and potential within it. When good comes from bad, yes, it happened for a reason, but that reason is that you made it happen.

So, my new cliche way of describing what I believe is that there is a silver lining in every situation. It may not always be visible, but have faith it’s there, and have the will to find it.

Now, take my belief or leave my belief. It makes no difference to your life unless you truly agree with it. My real hope is that I can inspire a few people to think on their own beliefs, just as my friend inspired me to think on mine. We’ve all heard the corny colloquialisms, think before you speak, think before you act, etc. But actually… imagine what could happen- the awareness we’d all have- if we all just thought a little more?


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